It is unusually hot and steamy here tonight. The television is full of images of the Queensland floods and the devastation that is being encountered by the people in the North. Poor Premier Anna Bligh looks exhausted - but resolvant. She is an amazing woman - I really admire her intelligence and elegant leadership style.
On Monday I was feeling flat. There are some crazy things happening in our families, work was hot as the airconditioner was broken and I was facing the policy-wonk's biggest fear: a report that is starting from a blank piece of paper. I just couldn't get myself motivated! It is interesting how quickly I slipped into thinking thoughts like... 'its ok, I'll just pop into David Jones at lunchtime'. The thoughts were quickly pushed aside due to my no-shopping commitment which forced me to really think about what shopping actually means for me.
A few years ago I had a friend who was a recovering alcoholic. We talked about it once as I had only known her while she was sober. She told me of the way she used alcohol to dull the pain and make herself feel better when she was having a hard time. I realised on Monday that 'shopping' has been like that for me. While I am able to say 'no' and not shop myself into a penniless stupor, it has been a way of dulling pain, boredom and frustration.
So... now when I'm having an awful day, am angry or bored, I am forcing myself to look at what that actually means for me - and deal with it! Seriously, I think I'm going to be a radically changed woman at the end of 2011.
Meanwhile, the GF diet is going well. I'm steadily regaining the energy I used to have. Unfortunately though, my skin has broken out and I look like a spotty teenager. It is probably just de-toxing but I do feel 16 again, with all the commensurate angst. I've found a recipe for breakfast bars at a great site called Gluten Free Goddess (definitely my sort of place) so will make some over the weekend to have in my bag at work - for when I get the munchies and can't find anything suitably GF. I'm travelling next week so will need something for between meetings etc.
So, my thoughts and prayers are with the people of Queensland. I'm not much for prayer in the traditional sense, but I'm sending good thoughts and vibes ... and, frankly, some cash to the Salvos! I think we should all do the same.
Till next time...
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